Should I Stay or Should I Go?

What if it Was the Other Person Who Left?

Many people have stayed in relationships that ranged from friendship to business to marriage to church attendance, and it was the last place they should have stayed.

Staying for the benefit of others is not a good enough reason to stay. God is bigger than divorce – of COURSE, He hates it! He hates that it occurs at all, and He hates what it does to people.

Unresolved relationship

But staying in a toxic relationship for the sake of law isn’t a good enough reason to stay. Ideally, BOTH people in ANY relationship must do the work that is necessary to heal themselves first – the relationship will follow.  But if only one person is doing the work, and the other is letting them … then there is nothing to work with.

Grace as an Excuse to Sin Freely

… or Law and Judgment that Paralyze Faith

A dear friend of mine has some of the most interesting and deeply thought out questions!

Which direction to take?This morning when I opened up my Yahoo Messenger, this comment and question regarding grace as an excuse, or law, was posted in my message window:

  • I’m reading in Romans 2 about the law. It’s no wonder there is such a pendulum swing on the conclusions we’ve all drawn in our own hearts…. Look at verse 31… “Do we then nullify the Law through faith? May it never be! On the contrary, we establish the Law.” (NASB)

Shattered Pastors, Shattered Marriages, Shattered Lives …

FrustratedThe moment sticks out in my mind as though it happened yesterday. As a young woman of 16, our lovely pastor’s wife sat down on the church bus seat next to me. The Hawaiian Luau youth event has long faded from my memory because of the following conversation between us became burned in my heart and ignited a passion that I have to this day.

Our pastor’s wife was beautiful, full of life and always very kind and loving. I wanted to be just like her. To have her choose to sit down next to me that day made my heart soar. What an honor!

To Judge or Not to Judge?

Guest Blogger, Laura Smith

A righteous judge always considers all the evidence and statements from eyewitnesses before coming to a verdict. A skilled judge perceives the heart of the matter and discerns whether a person is lying or being honest. He has been in the business long enough and has seen enough people come through who were very convincing, and even has memories of cases that came through his courtroom in his early years that he second guessed himself on his ruling.

Unjust Accusations and Judgments … Happen

Judge and lawyer in the courtDon’t be mistaken – accusations WILL come.  There are always those who will cause division and strife in the Body of Christ by their words and actions.  Oh, that we could avoid such people – but they will always be with us.  It is something that we as pastors and ministers need to be constantly aware of for several reasons.

 As we live our lives in the famed “glass bowl” we are responsible for our actions and the words we speak.  All of us have made mistakes or said things we wish we hadn’t.  Whether said in exaggeration, or just said in wrong timing causing misunderstanding – we are made constantly aware of the fact that the words we, as pastors speak, carry more weight than anything others may say.  Whether it is fair or not doesn’t matter – it is so.

Unselfishness vs. Selfishness

Did you know that you can be selfish and still be someone who demands nothing from others and yet is constantly giving time, energy and money?

Did you know that you can receive many things from many people and even ask for them – and not be someone who is always giving to others – and NOT be selfish?

Confusing, isn’t it?

Through a wide variety of experiences beginning in childhood, we knit together belief systems and perceptions regarding relationships, money and spirituality. We try to live as best we know how – based upon those beliefs and perceptions. What we forget at times is that our perceptions and beliefs are built on shaky sand – and that sand is the millions of other beliefs that other people have told us.