Posts by Shannon

Confronting Abuse in Church Leadership: A Call to Courage and Justice As a survivor of abuse and later an Associate Pastor stepping in after a leader’s moral failure, I’ve seen the devastation of sexual abuse in the church. When leaders violate their flock, it’s not just a betrayal—it’s a crime that demands action. Here’s why Read More

When a church leader discovers that another leader is sexually abusing members and no one is taking action, the weight of responsibility can feel overwhelming. As a community entrusted with spiritual care, churches must prioritize justice, safety, and healing. Here’s a clear, actionable guide for leaders facing this crisis, grounded in ethical and biblical principles. Read More

As a leader or pastor’s wife, you may feel the weight of expectations—to be flawless, to have all the answers, and to fix everyone’s problems. These pressures can lead to burnout and a sense of failure when perfection proves unattainable. However, your true calling is not to be perfect or to fix others but to Read More

As a Christian leader or pastor’s wife, you hold a unique position to influence others by modeling critical thinking rooted in biblical truth. In a world saturated with misinformation, agendas, and distractions, you can guide others to discern truth, reject fear, and embrace the simplicity of Christ. By living authentically with love, peace, and grace, Read More

Spiritual Abuse vs. Toxic Beliefs: Understanding, Identifying, and Addressing Them Spirituality can be a source of comfort, guidance, and community, but it can also be misused in ways that harm individuals and groups. Two distinct yet interrelated issues in this realm are spiritual abuse and toxic beliefs quoted as scripture. While they often overlap, understanding their Read More

Consider the dangers of judgmental finger-pointing in the church, urging believers to discern truth by studying God’s Word and recognizing patterns of deception rather than condemning individuals. Return to love, humility, and the simplicity of Christ in navigating spiritual battles. Years ago, I stumbled across a website where a man listed every Christian teacher I’d Read More

Judgment vs. Discernment: Cultivating Love in Your Church In church communities, the way we perceive and respond to one another shapes our witness to the world. Too often, judgment overshadows discernment, leading to division rather than unity. By exploring why we judge, what we’ve been taught, and the fruits of our actions, we can shift Read More

Meetings with your leadership are a cornerstone of collaboration, designed to align teams, solve problems, and drive progress. But what happens when an individual hijacks the discussion? You’ve likely encountered this scenario: the group is focused on a specific topic, someone responds initially as if they’re on track, and then—bam—they pivot to their own personal Read More

Churches are meant to be places of healing, community, and spiritual growth. However, for some, religious environments can trigger or amplify dysfunctional thinking and trauma-related behaviors. This post explores how trauma and cognitive distortions intersect in church settings, their impact on individuals, and how churches can foster healing. Understanding Dysfunctional Thinking Dysfunctional thinking refers to Read More

In many church communities, deeply ingrained belief systems can subtly shape behavior, expectations, and even theology. While some of these beliefs are rooted in Scripture, others may arise from tradition, culture, or human agendas, often going unnoticed or being misidentified as biblically grounded. When these beliefs are used to control or shame congregants, they can Read More

Ministry life is a crucible. As pastors’ wives, we know the burn of betrayal—maybe from a trusted confidant, a church member, or even someone we mentored. We know the grind of hardship—financial strain, family tension, or the quiet ache of isolation that no one else sees. I’ve walked that road for decades, now retired, and Read More

Betrayal stings. Hardship wears you down. Ministry life can be a grinder—years of pouring out, only to face disappointment from the very people you’ve served. I’ve lived it as a pastor’s wife, now retired, and divorced. I’ve learned some raw truths along the way. One stands out: Healing is a necessity, not a luxury, and Read More